The Havoc Project

I feel compelled to point out that I realize that over time I have slowly distanced myself from the clan. Mistake upon mistake has led me down a path which has eventually ended with an overall disapproval and sometimes utter avoidance of me. I don’t think I need to go over all the things I’ve done over the past month/year/existence on this site, as the list would be long and slightly depressing to write. So instead I’ll cut straight down to the very core of why I am typing this. A long time ago I noticed very different reactions towards me; people were more open to me being in a conversation as well as typically more respectful towards my opinions. I have to say I’ve noticed, even before that nuking I’m notorious for, that the openness/respect slowly was slowly depleting until it was all but gone.

I realize that I’ve been tyrannical, radical, and overall a prick most of my existence on the site giving you PLENTY of ammunition to more than disapprove of me. I came to realize that this is in no way anyone’s fault but my own and that, in many ways, I created the burden I deal with now. That being so I began to think that if there was any hope in continuation, it had to be achieved through change.

Believe me, I had in many ways intended a full 360 life change that was going to get me back in order and back on my feet. Sadly that change happened for about a week, and soon after I found myself slowly coming back to terms with the person I once was. It was at this point a man upon this site (much wiser than me) pointed out that you can’t exactly change who you are, and that even if you try to, you both share a hell of a lot of similarities.

I realize this now to be true, and realize that I probably won’t be able to change the way I wanted to change. I even lack the drive to try. So instead of this “radical change” load of bullshit that I’ve been feeding myself, perhaps I’m just best off to start with small improvements upon myself. As a group of people who have gotten to know me better then most people I meet in my day to day life I ask you. What flaws within me cause you, as an individual, to find distaste in me? In what ways can I improve?

After you’ve answered those I have but one question left to ask. A question I have been asking myself over and over for a past few months now. Do I even belong on this site anymore?

Any answers would be appreciated.

I'll cut straight to your question, and answer you both directly and honestly.


- You were extremely self-righteous.
- You took criticism poorly.
- Your generally-serious online personality clashed with the rather laid-back and random personalities shared with the majority of the forum.


I'm glad you've reached this point in your self-discovery. I arrived here not long ago, and it's made me notice a few doors I previously... missed... so to speak.


I like to think you belong with us. You're one of our most senior members, after all, and easily my most trustworthy friend. But that's not for me to decide.

who's saint?

Havoc.

Trigger wrote:

- You were extremely self-righteous.
- You took criticism poorly.
- Your generally-serious online personality clashed with the rather laid-back and random personalities shared with the majority of the forum.

These are good points and all true about my personality. I realized all these things and more about myself prior to taking the personality quiz we both took in general psychology. Now I'm not sure how well you could relate to the personality it gave you but mine was spot on..

Using the personality type website we were each made aware of in psych class I will point out how these three flaws of my personality really can't be helped without great strides.

The first two points can be clumped together with this bit of information about INFPs. (Introverted iNtuitive Feeling Perceiving)

INFPs do not like conflict. If they must face it, they will always approach it from the perspective of their feelings. In conflict situations, INFPs place little importance on who is right and who is wrong. They focus on the way that the conflict makes them feel, and indeed don't really care whether or not they're right. They don't want to feel badly. This trait sometimes makes them appear irrational and illogical in conflict situations.

I can't really help that I am self righteous because I usually assess, decide, and then stick with which of two possibilities I like more and will argue anyone down because I believe that I am right in my cause (though I very well may not be).

Second I don't deal with criticism very well. Unless I feel like an utter jackass I don't use criticism (or shall we say trolling since were on the internet) unless criticism is used towards me. I believe I fully pointed out my feelings toward criticism in the halo thread (if anyone actually went to reading my "walls of text"). The only time I really like criticism is times such as now when I've requested it.

Lastly you've pointed out my lack of randomness. And here is another brief analysis about INFPs in that sense.

They rely heavily on their intuitions to guide them, and use their discoveries to constantly search for value in life. They are on a continuous mission to find the truth and meaning underlying things. Every encounter and every piece of knowledge gained gets sifted through the INFP's value system, and is evaluated to see if it has any potential to help the INFP define or refine their own path in life.

No I'm not a random person neither online nor in real life. I don't find being random nearly as fun as most do. Instead I find fun in debates of philosophy, good and evil, religion, life choices. All very serious topics. In that sense perhaps I do need a different forum to rant and rave my thoughts.

In close I wish I could change these things. In fact I've tried (as I pointed out in my first post). Problematically personalities are hard to. change(or perhaps I lack the needed ability to adapt) and the only other option past that is social recluse. Regardless, thank you for pointing these factors out. Now if you could follow up by perhaps pointing out suggestions of how I might can get around these dilemmas I will very well give them a shot.

oh

...........

I really hate when people chng their names

....

*cough*

Now that we've gotten that out of the way do you perhaps think you can provide me with criticism/answers?

Awfully serious, compared to the rest of the members.
And what Trig said.

Self-absorbed

Self absorbed I can understand. But how might I ask does being serious deserve hatred?

Perhaps I lack the random trait but because of my lacking does that necessarily mean I deserve hate?

I don't believe so but perhaps that is what puts me in the wrong. Also I feel I should inquire about what factors of being serious are so annoying? (Examples please)

I'd like to get the root of this situation so that I can better improve my social activity upon the site. Since nobody has openly stated their wish for me to just leave I'll assume I have hope left in saving my social status.


On another note I was talking about personality types earlier and did some digging and now present a list of people with the same personality as me. Both fictional and non fictional people)

Real INFP People
A. A. Milne - author (Winnie the Pooh)
Albert Schweitzer - theologian, musician, physician
Aldous Huxley - English author
Amy Tan - author (The Joy-Luck Club)
Dick Clark - television personality
Fred Rogers - Mister Rogers' Neighborhood
Fred Savage - actor (The Wonder Years)
George Orwell - author, journalist
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow - American poet
Isabel Briggs Myers - psychological theorist
J. R. R. Tolkien - writer (Lord of the Rings)
James Herriot - veterinary surgeon, writer
John - Disciple of Jesus
John F. Kennedy, Jr. - lawyer, journalist, publisher
Laura Ingalls Wilder - author (Little House on the Prairie)
Mary - Mother of Jesus
Peter Jackson - filmmaker (Lord of the Rings)
Princess Diana - Princess of Wales
Scott Bakula - actor (Start Trek Enterprise)
Tom Brokaw - television journalist
Virgil - ancient Roman poet
William Shakespeare - English poet and playwright

Fictional INFPs (Characters)
Bastian Balthazar Bux - The Neverending Story
Calvin - Calvin and Hobbes
Doug Funnie - Doug cartoon
E.T. - E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial
Rocko - Rocko's Modern Life
Tommy Pickles - Rugrats
Wesley Crusher - Star Trek: The Next Generation

Well, here's an example

Randomguy1 - *Tells a joke*
Randomguy2 - *Lolz and responds with another joke*

Randomguy1 - *Tells a joke*
Havoc - *Explains why the joke is wrong*
Randomguy1 - *Hangs himself*
Randomguy2 - Y u do dis?? D':

Self-fashioned & Pretentious.

Trig explains things so that I don't have to

To trig: I dun do that! D<

To wesk: I get it already.. Your the third now to point out I'm self absorbed. D<

Kanden: you wish you could explain things so artistically. D<



Anyways, I suppose I'm up for trying to be less self absorbed (though I'm not sure how I'll do it) since that seems to be pointed out the most. I'm sure I can argue me being self absorbed but I won't.. As that would be being self absorbed. Lol

You're right, I do ;.;

Saint wrote:

Anyways, I suppose I'm up for trying to be less self absorbed (though I'm not sure how I'll do it)

A good start would be not making topics like these.

OH DAYUM

Saint wrote:

To wesk: I get it already.. Your the third now to point out I'm self absorbed. D<

But there are so many ways to word it!

I could be all like Mitsurugi from Soul Calibur and shout "Pretentious fool!"

D:

Kanden wrote:

You're right, I do ;.;

*Bites a hole out of your neck*

*Stores his leftover pizza in there*


Much luck to you, uh, Saint. D:<

I'll go ahead and tell you right now that you'll probably never lose the name Havoc. So far, I think Wesker is the only one to successfully ditch his original name. Twice, actually. At least.

Actually I did too, technically.

It doesn't help to use a crappy name like Saint in its place either.

What you need to do is get really high/drunk, think of all your favorite words, look up the latin versions for them, then combine the letters semi-randomly.

That's how the best names are made.

Or you could ask Cleverbot. Actually, I'll go ahead and do that for you.



There you go. Your new name. I had to suffer being patronized and called homo by a robot, but anyway...

Genius.


Do the same for me. D:<

Cleverbot has spoken.

I think you should awaken the cleverbot from its sleep one more time and tell it Havoc was displeased with its name choice and would prefer a second option. That one though cool is far too long for most forums

Frog Blast the Vent Core?! Fuck, I lol'd so hard at that.