So my dear lads! As you know, I received a Wii for Christmas, but what you might not
know is that I now am the owner of a ps3! My sister bought the one off my brother, so
hurrah!
Friday evening I had a friend drop by to hang out. We tried out Naruto Ninja Storm 2,
had toyed with the idea of playing Marvel Vs Capcom 3, but then he decided to let me
try out Skyrim. So we pop in the disc and my journey into Skyrim begins!
Like everyone else, I awoke on the back of a prison wagon, being escorted to some
town called Helgen. I was not alone, however! I was joined by a group made up of
all the familiar faces: a rebellious king and his general, a horse thief, myself and of
course, some guy who says he didn't do it. Idle chitchat broke out among most of
us, though I sat quietly and listened, simply marveling at the beauty of the region.
Before I knew it we passed the gates of Helgen and the guy who didn't do it suddenly
got very, very anxious. I wondered what for but well, why ask now? I was being the
silent badass, may as well keep up appearances! The small town of Helgen was pretty,
but rustic. So few people were out and about. A farm boy, a couple of soldiers, some
wenches that needed to be right wenched, ah but that would have to wait! We came to
a stop in the town square where a group of soldiers awaited us. We were all told to
get out and line up, and to step forward when our name was called. I knew what was
going on then, we were bout to be executed. Sure enough, one of us was. I think it
was the rebel king, or his general, I'm not sure because both looked alike. Well, none
the less, the dude's head got chopped off and then the guy who didn't do it was called
next. He begged and pleaded for salvation, proclaiming innocents once more, and was
promptly told to accept his death with some dignity, of course, he said "nuts to that"
and tried to escape, and took an arrow to the back. I thought these guys usually aimed
for the knee.
help, the next name to come up was my own and to my surprise, a character creator
was suddenly thrust into my face! Talk about spoilers, huh? I didn't know how long I
had to play the game, so I just threw a character together. I scrolled through the races
and didn't really like any of them. The nords were nice, the elves surprisingly ugly, and
hey, there's a furry and scalie! Haw! Between the two, I took the cat, they looked nicer.
I named myself Lynxo, after an old Thundercats character, and because I had those
wicked looking ears! So I finished creating Lynxo and to my surprise again, one of the
lot wishing to put me to death had a sudden change of heart, he felt sorry for me and
tried to beg for leniency on my behalf, but the hardass cunt in charge saw fit that I die
like the others at hand. Well, can't blame the guy for trying. I kneel before the axeman's
block and await the final blow, when what should I see but a dragon, swooping in from
skies, only to land atop the tower behind the axeman. What ensued was glorious and
just retribution!
The dragon laid siege to town of Helgen that would have been the site of my grave, but
I feel my savior was a bit over enthusiastic in my rescue, as several times throughout my
escape attempt I was nearly felled by his righteous fury. I was surprised to learn that one
of the guards was willing to take me to safety, so I followed him throughout the chaos until
we reached the safety of a tower. There I was freed, then armed with a sword, armor and
other essential items. It seemed things would turn out Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwright, until
the dragon shoved his head through the stone wall and fried one of our companions. It's
funny how life tends to rain shit, or rather in this case, fire, down on your parade. =\ I
heard the poor guy was but a day away from retirement, so sad.
Anywho, with our safety compromised, we made our way outside and made way for the
catacombs beneath the city. However, we met some stiff resistance along the way and
were forced to kill a number of guards. We met a rather chipper fellow who was in the
business of truth seeking, and by that I mean he was an inquisitor, and delighted in
torturing people. We seemed to walk in on him as he quelled a couple of rowdy clients.
Now that I recall, my companion had brought us here for potions, and potions we got,
but I got something else, a fine magic spell by the title of Sparks! With the help of a
rusty lockpick set, I was now able to wield the power of lightning in the palm of my
hands! Much to the lamenting of our inquisitor, of course. I don't think he wanted to
part with that magic spell. Tough shit, fucker! The world is mine!
With potions stocked, lightning in hand, we continued on to our destination. It was then
that I sustained several projectile wounds to the neck. To my astonishment, they didn't
kill me, hell, they barely hurt! Tho swallowing with an arrow through your larynx is a little
bothersome... Nevertheless me and my companion pressed on! We ran into several ugly
giant spiders, but they were no match for my electrical wrath! I was feeling great by then!
I felt I could do anything! Dreams of world domination filled my head as we walked, though
I suppose that was a bad thing, I knew my companion was saying something to me, but I
didn't quite make out what it was. Here I am, walking and minding my own business when
all of a sudden, something catches my eye. A big fuzzy lump, squirming and getting, up?
"Oh, hello brother bear!" I said merrily as I recognized what the furry mass was! However,
brother bear wasn't so happy to see me... He angrily roared in my direction then charged
at me! What I wanted to do was just back away, but it wasn't what I did, before I knew it
I threw my hand up and was pumping lightning into brother bear's face, and then it dawned
on me! I know what my companion had said! "We should sneak past it." That was what he
said. "What was that about sneaking??" I shouted back to my companion as brother bear
fell dead at my feet. Lightning to the face has that kind of effect, ya know? Course, pelting
brother bear with my sword didn't help any, I'm sure.
My companion didn't speak to me much after the bear incident. I don't see what his deal
was. it wasn't as if brother bear had attacked him. Oh well, the silence was brief, we made
it out of the caves after that once more we were greeted by the wilds of Skyrim. But I was
not free yet, no. My companion decided it would be best to go to the nearest town and warn
the villagers at the impending dragon apocalypse, or something of that. Ah well, I suppose
it'll have to wait til next time.
